What We Have Learned in Our Marriage

by | Apr 2, 2016 | 8 comments

We recently were asked to share with a group of couples the keys we have learned over the past 32 years in pursuing a dynamic marriage.

We are more in love today than when we married almost 32 years ago!

By God’s grace, our marriage is the strongest and sweetest it has ever been!

Some tips that have helped us include:

1. Individually pursue a close relationship with Jesus. The closer we each get to God, the closer we each get to each other.

2. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, which means don’t let offenses build up, but apologize and make things right quickly.

3. Never say put downs or negative name calling, but instead, praise each other with a grateful spirit.

4. Go out on regular dates and enjoy each other’s company.

5. We recommend husbands and wives to read together the book, “His Needs, Her Needs” by Willard F. Harley.


Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar

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  1. Carolyn Swiger

    You are a beautiful couple and have a wonderful family. May our Precious Lord continue to bless and keep your union! I admire you SO MUCH!

  2. Sarah Blackstone

    I am delighted to see your recommendation for the book “His Needs, Her Needs.” Dr. Harley’s books have been a great blessing in our marriage! We have a whole shelf of marriage books, but his are by far the best.

  3. marnie amellia

    Blessings to you both, i am celebrating my 48th anniversary this year, and ny love of God grows stronger each year. May you both be Blessed with many more years to come your way.

  4. Jana Hackson

    May God bless you both abundantly. Thank you for being such an encouragement and blessing in my life. I have 3 beautiful babies because of your life story!

  5. Mary Frances Sulzen

    Dear Jim Bob and Michelle, Greetings from down the road. God be praised! I am so pleased that I found this blog…not very computer literate yet. Anyway, don’t know if you remember us…we adopted a sibling group, have met or ran into you at different March for Life, Silver Dollar City, thrift shopping, etc. We know John from Tontitown fire dept. we attend at St. Joseph’s Catholic Church. Our prayers have been with you and your family as you all go through, adjust, and mend in this family trial…God is surely with you! We put up our new billboard on old 71, across from Drake Field…Trust Jesus! We are so blessed to have God, as He is with you all, never despair…through all the tears, give all to God! We love your family, and are thankful to God for all the wonderful example, advice, and help you have given countless families, on the value of Families through the years, even financial…we complete Ramsey and have not used credit cards in over 5 years now. Still need to make homemade soap yet! I send you Michelle an internet hug & prayer. God has made you all so strong, you will all weather this storm. I have written you numerous times in my mind, and you are in my heart. Your older ones have also met my brother Michael Drake at several events, DC I think. SO, to my situation… I don’t know if you ever are looking for a project. I know life is very full, and now you have grand-babies as well:) Just an Idea, pray about it: I have often wanted to get ahold of a Home or Kitchen Makeover, but 1 we don’t own a tv, watch it, but at one low point I had even written, then never mailed. We live in WestFork, in country, 12 of us at home, living paycheck to paycheck (God is SO GOOD that we have not gone further in debt, our children are healthy, Thanks be to God!) We do excavation, dirt work, basements, ponds, etc. John (my!) has now 3 of our sons working with him fulltime, so it is normally dawn to dusk…we pray as a family at 6:15am, then it’s to work, & school. After adoption finalized we realized homeschooling rules could change, will change, and after prayer we decided that I would return to UA & finish my Educational Studies degree, while keeping the children at school (Fayetteville Christian & 3 with scholarships at New School, I did my 1st internship there). Long story short, I didn’t know if you were looking for community projects we could do with some help! Things just keep falling down around our ears. It is humbling, but we are doing the best we can, well, we could always do better, and strive for that!! We qualify for food stamps, but I refuse to apply for them (drain on society, we can live on rice & beans for long time!) If you feel moved to help (I was thinking painting parties, rock wall building, gardening, kitchen redo, tile laying, did I mention painting purge, purge, purge of stuff!!) All of our children would work with proper guidance, knowledge, and with God fearing people…I was thinking of when school is out, end of May. I know you are all very busy. We as a family always make commitments to go sing at rehab, nursing homes, and hospice. Visit the sick. Feed the poor. I am just overwhelmed, and I think our ‘castle’ needs some TLC. GOD BLESS YOU ALL! thank you for listening. Please keep being the wonderful family you are!!!!!

  6. Susan Kimler

    and….NEVER allow wrath to direct your behavior. Stop and think outside of the very narrow box the world holds out to you! Allow God to lead all of your responses…especially in crisis. God bless you, and thank you Anna for your remarkable courage.

  7. Claire Finley

    I wish the girls would find a career first then get married. I believe Jana would make a wonderful nurse. This would be another way of sharing your christian values by letting them go out into the world. If anything ever happened to their future spouse they would still be able to raise their family.

  8. Jess Plew

    I’m so thankful I came across this posting. My husband and I are in a rough spot and this is very eye opening on helping to bring us out of our slump. Thank you so much for sharing your advice! God bless you and your family


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